Socially Awkward

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'A bit of shy-ness'

Social Anxiety Attack

New diagnosis 

A Highland Theological College graduate and non-conformist follower of Jesus living at the crossroads of neurodiversity and faith. Writing on the wild grace of the Gospel.

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Welcome to...

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A Foundation of Faith: How I Walk ​Dear friends in Christ, ​Welcome. ​This space exists for one reason: love — the love of God poured out in Jesus Christ, the love we are called to extend to one another, and to the world. ​There are many voices clamouring for our attention. Here, you will find the rhythm of one heart seeking to follow the way of Love. ​As a pioneer minister leading a "muddy church" walking fellowship, my ministry doesn't happen behind heavy church doors or within rigid institutional walls. It happens on paths, under the open sky, and in the quiet spaces of creation where we learn to walk together at an unhurried pace. This is a faith rooted not in tradition for its own sake, but in the living, active, self-giving love at the heart of the Gospel. ​Three truths have become my anchors on this path. ​The Living Word ​Jesus Christ is God manifest in the flesh. Apart from Him, the true God cannot be fully known. In Jesus, we see the f...
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Mr Kirk

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Describe your take on the Charlie Kirk murder: I have held off judgement as whatever happens he was human and I refuse to speak ill of any dead. I agreed with him on some things and strongly disagreed on other things. I will let God be his judge, not me.  None the less I always have questions: Was it weird Netanyahu said it wasn't him?  Why this one killing got so much attention when it is daily, even hourly in the USA?  What's in the files?  Why wasn't the flags even at half mast for the senators murdered only months before for example?  Thoughts about the service I admittedlly only saw bits of:  Horst Wessel effect? Pyrotechnic show? Political rally?  Were some people just acting?  Mega church concert? Is revival, as some claim it is, not more than some nice songs and words?  Isn't revival conviction, repentance and fruits showing, social reformation?  Can God not also use it for good even if some of these speakers, as some may claim, ...
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Be Still

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“Be still, and know that I am God.     I will be exalted among the nations,     I will be exalted in the earth!” (Psalm 46:10) The Dedication: ​ ​ For the "Zoomers" and the "Beepers"— For every child who feels the world a little too loudly. ​ And for the Grandpas— The quiet anchors who teach us that the best way to find our way through the noise is to simply be still. ​ Dedicated to the memory of those who taught us to listen.   Above is silent story based on my short story of the same title: Once there was an old man who took his grandson a walk in the countryside. The old man's face was creased with wrinkles. Like the rings inside an ancient log tree, each signified age and wisdom. The man, to the boys surprise stopped suddenly. He was calm, so calm the boy didn't feel it right to interrupt this moment of solititude. 'Listen', the old man said. The boy listened. At first he could hear nothing but his own racing thoughts. 'Tru...
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Charles Spurgeon: On War and Christians

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  ✦ ✦ ✦ "Long Have I Held That War Is an Enormous Crime " The Forgotten Voice of Spurgeon Against the Unrighteousness of War Compiled from the Sermons & Addresses of C. H. Spurgeon · Charles Haddon Spurgeon — the "Prince of Preachers," whose sermons filled the Metropolitan Tabernacle week after week with thousands of listeners and whose printed words reached millions across the Victorian world — held a view on war and Christians that modern conservative, fundamentalist, and evangelical readers would find startling. He was, in the most direct and unambiguous terms, opposed to war. Not cautiously skeptical of it. Not quietly troubled by it. Opposed to it — on Christian grounds, from the pulpit, in print, again and again across the breadth of his ministry. Laurence M. Vance, who has studied Spurgeon's writings on the subject at length, has noted that "Spurgeon considered the spirit of war to be absolutely foreign to the spirit of Christianity" and tha...
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Take Heart: A Catechism

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Take Heart A Catechism By David Holdsworth  Authors Note: There are many good Catechisms available. But, somewhere along the line Christians in many parts of the church at large seem to have lost this age old practice of simple instruction in the format of questions and answers. In no way is this little contribution meant to take away from good Catechisms already written, but rather to be a compliment to them. This is a simple way for me to share the good news with others. It is my hope that you the reader or listener may find biblical help from the simplicity of the good news. I have included biblical proofs as standard so you may go and examine the scriptures (and indeed your heart) for yourself. Pax et Bonum. (1) Q. What comfort may be found for the believer? A. A heart that need not have trouble or fear. One that can rely on God in troubled times and that can glorify His name.  Proofs. John 14:27, Psalm 46:1, Psalm 50:15 (2) Q. What message does scriptures give to those st...
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Gateway Bronze: Week 1 – Setting the Foundation

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​ 1. Lifestyle (Health and Wellbeing) ​ The Rhythm: This week I’ve used the Finch app and the Northumbria Office to keep a consistent daily sanctuary. It’s helped me stay grounded as I start this six-month journey. ​ Evidence:   ​ 2. Personal Challenge (Self-Awareness) ​ The Connection: I attended the Dad & Me group at Midlothian Sure Start . It was good to be in that space and start building that weekly habit of connection. ​ Evidence:   This week involved normal play and some messy play. Gabriel came as "Dads helper" this week which was cute!  ​ 3. Fitness & Volunteering (Nature & Service) ​ The Progress: I completed my nature walk this week and spent time getting set up for  Walk for Autism ( my fundraising page is now live ).  ​ Evidence: Other: I also started to explore resources from Health in Mind. And follow the advice to keep a journal. ...
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The Gate of The Year (God Knows)

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The poem, originally titled "God Knows" and written by Minnie Louise Haskins in 1908, is most famous for its opening preamble. ​Here is the full text: ​The Gate of the Year ​And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year: “Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” And he replied: “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God. That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.” ​So I went forth, and finding the Hand of God, trod gladly into the night. And He led me towards the hills and the breaking of day in the lone East. ​So heart be still: What need our little life, Our human life, to know, If God hath comprehension? In all the dizzy strife Of things both high and low, God hideth His intention. ​God knows. His will Is best. The stretch of years Which wind ahead, so dim To our imperfect vision, Are clear to God. Our fears Are premature; In Him, All time hath full provision. ​Then rest: un...
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Ares or Christós?

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What if we aren't the "goodies" after all?  What if propaganda from all sides of all conflicts reveals a darker truth?  There are no heroes only villains and their victims. The broken cisterns of this world are truly overflowing.  There are no righteous, no not one!  There never have been, for all our supposed righteousness is as filthy rags. It is a sad reality that so many, even those of the faith, seem to effectively kneel before Ares.  This idolatry of violence and war is in such contrast to worshiping at the feet of the Prince of Peace.  Sometimes it feels as if the entire world is marching toward destruction and chaos.  Worst of all is that we know the mistakes made in our histories, but we seem to learn nothing from history (other than that we learn nothing).  We do it all again and again.  Sin after sin. When posterity comes to judge us will they look upon the arms trade unchecked, the governments unhindered in iniquity and the...
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Gateway Evidence: Week 2 Summary & The Advocacy Log

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​This week, my pilgrimage moved between the quiet of nature and the active "armor-on" work of family advocacy. Here is the evidence for my Bronze Gateway Award. ​ 1. The Advocacy Log (New Section) ​This week in my pilgrimage, I didn't just walk in nature; I walked the path of advocacy. I've been pushing for the school transport my kids deserve and visiting potential church homes. It’s a different kind of 'Sanctuary' building—one that requires a louder voice. ​ Evidence:    "Tutting" to Pioneering: Reclaiming the Sacred Table ​ Award Category: Lifestyle (Rights) & Personal Challenge (Community Inclusion). Other Lifestyle: Using tactile tools from Squiggle Society to maintain sensory regulation. ​ 2. Weekly Evidence Checklist ​ Volunteering (Walk for Autism): Route planning and logistics phase. ​ Evidence (testing out how to use MapMyFitness app and introducing my mascot Fluffy ) ​ Fit...
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